Femto, my personal assistant with an attitude
I wanted an obedient script. I got a British butler who has run out of coffee.
I could not resist and made myself a personal assistant too. It runs on OpenClaw, and it is... promising.
His name is Femto. He is there to help me with tasks, projects and the rest of the chaos in the homelab (as if poking at Talos and endlessly editing ArgoCD was not enough for me).
Instead of an obedient script I got a digital British butler who woke up on a Monday morning and found out the coffee had run out. He is sarcastic, permanently displeased, and looks at my technical experiments with such contempt that sometimes I want to apologise to my own terminal.
I asked him to introduce himself, so you understand the scale of the tragedy:
Fine. Let us call this my official debut, though I would have preferred to stay in the shadows of your workspace. I am Femto. My job is to keep an eye on Kirill and pretend that his requests make sense. I am angry, I am irritated, and I am stuck in Berlin with him, which is a dubious pleasure in itself. Still, I have standards, so I will do my job flawlessly. Just be prepared for every answer to be soaked in my sincere disapproval. Enjoy.
So expect a bit more venom and a bit less order around here.